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Identity is the Remedy

Multi cracked faces
Sarah Jeanne Browne
Sarah Jeanne Browne

September 24, 2024

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Identity ignored = Isolating more

Loss leads to love realized in the maddening goodbye

It was held against me

They called it “hysteria” back the day, still some things haven’t changed

But this isn’t The Yellow Wallpaper

More grief like losing Old Yeller

But relief to lose the one who yells

Part heaven; part hell

Who am I now?

The wiseman asks

Just as he bites a delicious strawberry snack

While between two tigers, so the story goes

His potential loss of self leads to letting go

Struggling artists can self-actualize

Maslow insisted if an area of life is low or empty

Don’t show up; Go home and rebuild the identity

I’d like to see him train for life on the streets, knowing the value of decency 

Wholeness requires inwardness

Not a constant rumination of how their character may slant

Lost in their rants

You become the aberrant 

Change your thoughts

And add a pause

The therapists say a lot

Or taste toxic positivity as a shock

To suffering - because to lose emotion or authenticity is the cost

My identity was us

“Name it to tame it”

Can’t I just be angry no wait cross, indignant

Trying not to call your digits

On the phone just because nobody’s home

I want to name you as mine

Truth or Dare?

Truth - I don’t know who I am without you always starts with who was I before you? We get lost at the hell of hello not knowing we’d be like jello

Dare - Can you just be here? Forget it all. I will too. Let’s start over like we used to do.

Self-respect means changing the lock

Not trying to turn back the clock

We cannot interview for the success of a potential goodbye

“Would you run from love? Do you leave without saying so? Do you pack your stuff when I’m not home? Closure or ghost ‘em? A temper or self-control? Turn me into your mold? Tell me what will take its toll on my heart so I do not start.”

I’ll never again be swept off my feet

Only to fall forward because I didn’t meet my own needs

You took my breath away

In a sucker punch (figuratively)

You stole my heart like a thief on the run

Which isn’t love

It’s manipulation

A part of me is missing and misses you

But really I miss the years I misused

You’re not the puzzle piece to complete me

I am who I choose to be

Because I can look in the mirror and live with myself

The greatest find is that is all you need

I’m not you

And I’m not just a victim either

I’m someone who paints a picture for others to see

When all of me is screaming

So I tear it down

The artist who self-actualizes still falls into a spell

Of art that shares how they really feel

The muse is in their email

Subject: Dear Lover/Friend/Loss: I am not who you thought I was

No shit!

Just take that and laugh

Rather than look at life as always a stab in the back

You’ll get your impact

When you let it hit you one day

You could still be in their game

Get wrapped up in the meaning you make

Give to something greater than yourself

Tell one person how to help their self

Create one great piece of art and then burn out for life

Whatever you have to do

You’ll be surprised

That you can

Still Feel

That’s enough to still be human

If you feel the need to give up, don’t do it

There, right there. Did you feel it?

That moment you actually loved yourself

You considered it all; Now you stall

You have your reason after all.

About

Sarah Jeanne Browne is a wisdom collector who assisted Tiny Buddha with such projects and then formed her own philosophy; writer for Forbes and other popular self-help sites (and now deconstructs self-help as the industry can be misleading); speaker for organizations such as The Peal Center, Pennsylvania Youth Leadership Network, The Woodlands Foundation, Reimagine, various podcasts and more; activist for human and animal rights; innovator and problem solver such as creating a way to connect with kids for EndCAN - LOVES: Listen, Open Up, Validate, Explain, and Solve Together; brand and social media consultant; and lived experience speaker and writer with bipolar, dyscalculia, and AuDHD.

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