Room for Grief
Every third Thursday of the month, the Reimagine community holds space for those mourning loss. Volunteers facilitate these peer-led gatherings using art and prompts to spark conversation and reflection. Room for Grief gatherings are intended for adults across generations.
Garrick Colwell, President, and CEO of Kitchen Table Conversations, facilitates these workshops and webinars. Garrick has been a Hospice Volunteer since 1987, serving as an on-call hospital and hospice chaplain. He is a Respecting Choices® Person-Centered Care First Steps® Advance Care Planning Certified Instructor and Facilitator. As a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist, he co-created with Hospice Austin Conversations On Grief, a monthly online grief support educational program. He co-facilitates drop-in and loss of spouse grief support groups as a volunteer. Garrick is a Certified Grief Educator through grief expert David Kessler at grief.com. And holds a Death and Grief Studies certificate from the internationally recognized Center for Loss and Life Transition, a private organization founded and directed by Dr. Alan Wolfelt. In addition to offering advance care planning webinars, Kitchen Table Conversations also provide webinars on End of Life Planning, After Death Care and Support and Grief Education. Topics, dates, and times can be found on https://kitchentableconversations.org.
What’s said here stays here, what’s learned here leaves here.
See these questions (and this whole experience) as an invitation, not a demand. If you are moved to answer a different question than one we have listed, go for it. If you’re moved to sit and listen, that’s ok too - just being here is participating.
Speak from the heart
We’re used to speaking what we think we should, what we think others want to hear, or from ideas or stories we’ve told ourselves over and over. See if you can take risks to root into what is true and to share from that vulnerable place.
Listen from the heart
See if you can be fully present to what’s here, listening with compassion to whoever is speaking. Try on turning any judgement that arises (including judgment of yourself!) into wonder. “I wonder what brought her to this belief?” “I wonder what I don’t get?” “I wonder what my reaction teaches me about myself?” See if it’s possible to set aside judgment to listen to others—and to yourself—more deeply.
No one right way
There’s no one right way to grieve, to do this retreat, or to express yourself (for example: totally ok to cry, and totally ok not to cry). Try to reserve judgment, of others and of yourself.
Trust the silence
Take a few breaths before even thinking of responding or offering your own words. Learn to trust the silence, and to notice what arises in it. Take your time.
Cool is the enemy
Try on the idea that you (and everyone else here) totally belong. Let’s try to be an easy crowd for each other. That means presuming welcome, and extending welcome. What if we all let go of “cool”? Cool is the enemy. ;)
Share air time
Take space & make space. Groups work best when everyone has their eye on this.
Speak your truth in ways that respect other people’s truths. Consider using “I” statements so that you can speak from your center, instead of generalizing or making assumptions about everyone else.
No fixing, saving, advising, correcting
No need to jump in to fix anything, save anyone, or offer unsolicited advice. Trust folks’ own processes.
Focus on stories about loved ones
This is a space in which we center stories and support. If you are here to challenge or argue the safety practices of others (e.g., masking in public, vaccinations), this is not a space for you.