I have very fond memories of my childhood and experiencing the constant change of the seasons.
I couldn't verbalize it in my youth, but I now understand that with each passing season, nature is providing us with constant visual reminders that change is about to happen, and that nature (like life) does not stay the same. Life is always transitioning.
A Necessary Conversation (ANC) believes that by openly speaking about life, and the impermanence of it (death), we can "reshape and refocus" our priorities.
When we actively "re-prioritize" our lives, it becomes clear, to most of us, that it is our relationships that brings the greatest meaning to our hearts.
Take the opportunity today to enrich your valued relationships and to gain deeper connections with loved ones.
Meaningful relationships are so important, that often times, the dying share a great desire to make sure their relations are set right before they die. There is great comfort, for everyone involved, knowing that kindred relations are in good standing.
ANC implements "The 3-E's" in to your journey, so that you can be proactive, and not wait for a crisis or an illness to enrich your relations. Start your necessary conversations now.
A Necessary Conversation's Mission is to support those that want to transform their experiences with death, dying and grief.
Live with intention through death awareness, death education and community support.
LIVE DEATH AWARE.
LIVE DEATH AWARE
Live your life fully alive each day,
while consciously acknowledging
that death is always a part of life.
Life is impermanent, so make your days count!
LIVE = remain alive, present
DEATH = end of life, departure from life
AWARE = conscious, cognizant, knowledgeable
My name is Dee Dee, and A Necessary Conversation is an endeavor to offer an alternative approach to those yearning to experience End of Life matters, in a spiritually-rooted state of being. The relationships we cultivate between living, dying, death and bereavement will deeply influence our reactions and responses to life and death situations.
As a child, I was always curious about death and dying....but I quickly learned that these subjects matters are rarely discussed in our society. So, I did what most of us do: I avoided any kind of self-awareness around these topics for many, many years.
Like many people, I have encountered different circumstances of death (children, young adults, accidents, sickness and murder). The more death I experienced, the more uncomfortable I became with how I was processing End of Life situations. Never once did it occur to me, that I could change how I spiritually responded to death, dying and grief.
Then, the ultimate tipping point happened. I received an unexpected call: My Dad had suddenly died. I was rapidly engulfed with so many different feelings and emotions! I could not control the psychological roller coaster that was now my reality.
I remember the feelings of:
Profound loss and heartache.
I remember thinking:
I can't believe my Dad is no longer on this earth.
I’m now officially an orphan.
What a stupid thing to think! I am an adult and I don’t need my dad!
My Dad had to die alone.
My Dad was in a cold morgue and alone in a funeral home.
Strangers were taking care of my Dad and his body.
I was betraying my Dad, by not being with him during this time.
And then the grief came! I experienced:
Difficulty sharing my feelings.
Pretending I was fine, even though I was devastated.
Confusion as to why I could not “move past” this death.
Feeling as if I was losing part of myself in this whole death process.
A short time after my Dad's death, my sisters and I were surprised, and unsettled, to be given the responsibility of orchestrating our Dad's "funeral and reception." We felt inadequate to make such significant decisions on his behalf, and we had no idea where to turn to for guidance.
Fortunately for us, a heartfelt deed quickly transpired: Our Mom offered to help us "celebrate" our Dad! What is amazing about this overture, is that our parents had been divorced for over 18 years, and both of them had created new lives for themselves.
Nevertheless, our Mom:
Generously allowed us the space to grieve.
Supported us in the planning of our "Dad's Life Celebration.”
Inspired us to focus on our Dad's genuine qualities when making decisions.
Encouraged us to be true to ourselves, all while honoring our Dad's memory.
Collaborated with us to help create a loving, and an amazingly beautiful, "Life Celebration."
Exhibited that when one puts love in front of everything else, life and humanity can be harmonious.
Graciously encouraged us to be spiritually present and to feel all of our emotions, but to also enjoy "One of the best days of our lives!"
A few seasons after my Dad's heartwarming Life Celebration, I was finally ready to start exploring my own deep-rooted feelings around End of Life situations. I earnestly wanted to start building emotionally healthier bridges between living, dying, death and grief.
I knew that I needed a wide range of spiritual tools to experience both the pain, and the joy, that comes with life and death. Understanding this, I have been inspired and motivated to seek, and attain, varied education, training and professional certification as a Facilitator and Death Doula in End of Life Care.
I live in the Los Angeles area with my husband of 32 years.
I have two children that I deeply love.
I am also "Mom" to two dogs.
I am in profound gratitude that I've been in recovery for over 22 years. Throughout these years, I have been given the opportunity to help countless women by guiding each of them through the physical, and the emotional changes necessary, to lead healthy and fulfilling lives.